Yes, I am tired. For many reasons. I feel like I have an obligation to everyone in the world. And I feel like without obliging to them, I fail. And when I fail, people doubt me, blame me, etc. And then when they need me again, they come back. And when I fail them, they leave and continue to doubt and blame me.



That is the world I'm living.



I have to be perfect everywhere in the world, careful with my every move not to offend anyone. I have to be careful in showing that I love everyone, that I care for everyone. I have to be careful to not go over my limits. I have to be careful to make sure that I can be happy myself. But it just seems that the more careful I am, the more I fail.



Why? Then should I not be careful?



If I am not careful, I offend people. If I am not careful, I was said to ignore people. If I am not careful, I was said to be overdoing things. If I am not careful, I was said to be a selfish girl.



So can I not be careful?



I don't know anymore. No one cares how much effort I put. Not one even try to see. They think that every smile and laughter on my face are genuine. But they are not. They are just there because of the need to oblige people. They are just there so I could hide the feelings deep down. They are just there so that people will not see the worse side of me.



And I hate having to be so stiff everytime. I feel tired when I'm with people. I feel tired that I have to be perfect in everything. I feel tired that people expected so much out of me.



I just want to be alone.



That is all.



So just, let me rest, okay?! I cannot have a thousand brains to oblige a thousand people! I trusted you all, but you all failed me. I tried to tell myself to ignore those feelings deep down within me, and continue to smile even though I'm doing something I don't like, just so you people can feel happy about it! I tried so hard! I really did! And just, look, you damned people!!



Or if you don't want to see, just get the hell out of my sight for now.



I don't want to feel oblige anymore. I don't want to be responsible anymore.



I JUST WANT TO BE MYSELF, OKAY?!

Everything's different , xoxo





I'm just a girl who's random and lives with it. I enjoy HTML so I change my blog skins a lot. I also type a lot so you might find yourself a new pair/another new pair of glasses if you read my blog too much. :D More ?








5S3-rians
Ah Oh
Zi Liang
Jia Ying
Sherene
Jocelynn
Wei Yang

Kwang Hua Mates
Xin Bei
Maxine
Jia Yee
Yee Yun
Yong Wen

Japanese Hosts
Hui Hui
Fion See

The Special One
Wan Chying

College Pals
Michelle Lim
Loretta Amanda

Family
Ian
Thom
Duo Tong
Kimberly Koh
My Other Blog

Talking Porn 8D

OMG! PHOTOSHOP MADNESS~

How I Met Him...or Her.

The Huuuuuge Delay

DELL STUDIO XPS 16!!

WOW Time at Skype! :D

First Week of College = Wow.

ICPU - A New Lifestyle?

Blahblahs

Random Update

Made by Hester .
More info ? Click here

Your profile here .

Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester Hester

Designer : Hester
Basecodes : Chocoxbaby
Brushes : Aethereality

Yes, I am tired. For many reasons. I feel like I have an obligation to everyone in the world. And I feel like without obliging to them, I fail. And when I fail, people doubt me, blame me, etc. And then when they need me again, they come back. And when I fail them, they leave and continue to doubt and blame me.



That is the world I'm living.



I have to be perfect everywhere in the world, careful with my every move not to offend anyone. I have to be careful in showing that I love everyone, that I care for everyone. I have to be careful to not go over my limits. I have to be careful to make sure that I can be happy myself. But it just seems that the more careful I am, the more I fail.



Why? Then should I not be careful?



If I am not careful, I offend people. If I am not careful, I was said to ignore people. If I am not careful, I was said to be overdoing things. If I am not careful, I was said to be a selfish girl.



So can I not be careful?



I don't know anymore. No one cares how much effort I put. Not one even try to see. They think that every smile and laughter on my face are genuine. But they are not. They are just there because of the need to oblige people. They are just there so I could hide the feelings deep down. They are just there so that people will not see the worse side of me.



And I hate having to be so stiff everytime. I feel tired when I'm with people. I feel tired that I have to be perfect in everything. I feel tired that people expected so much out of me.



I just want to be alone.



That is all.



So just, let me rest, okay?! I cannot have a thousand brains to oblige a thousand people! I trusted you all, but you all failed me. I tried to tell myself to ignore those feelings deep down within me, and continue to smile even though I'm doing something I don't like, just so you people can feel happy about it! I tried so hard! I really did! And just, look, you damned people!!



Or if you don't want to see, just get the hell out of my sight for now.



I don't want to feel oblige anymore. I don't want to be responsible anymore.



I JUST WANT TO BE MYSELF, OKAY?!